Look out world - in just a few days' time, you're probably not going to see that much of me for a month. Busy, busy, busy. So, in light of some recent events and the fact that you'll be without my rambling sentences for a while (was that a collective sigh of relief I just heard?) I thought I'd give you one more little snippet before I disappear.
I am changing my name to Cyrano de Bergerac. No, my nose is not obnoxious, nor do I plan on rhinoplasty to make it that way. No, I cannot wield a sword to save my life. However, when a young friend of mine comes up to me today and says simply, "So what are the rules for taking someone out on a dinner-date?" Well, I think I've made my mark as the "hidden somewhere in the shadows voice/puppetmaster" So, I gave him the rules. Thankfully, I was not actually asked to feed the correct words to him, and he should have enough wisdom to find them on his own - he's a pretty bright chap, after all. But the essence is the same: I was asked to supply the method and means for this guy to....never mind. I don't wanna know ANY of the details.
But I KNOW you're all dying to hear just what I told this young fella. So here you go - the rules for a first date/dinner!!!!!!!
There are two basic rules, and only two basic goals.
GOAL #1: Make sure the lady in question has an excellent time.
GOAL #2: Make sure the lady in question wants to have a SECOND excellent time.
Anything else that happens - be it from the mundane to the....not so mundane - is extra. Gravy. Not necessary, but welcome. A happy accident. A natural awesome. The goals are simple, and they should never get you into trouble. If things don't work out and become anything, she still had a nice time and will have no reason to say anything bad about you. This protects your reputation. If things do work out for the better, then it achieves the goal of getting the second date. EITHER WAY, SHE WILL TELL HER FRIENDS. If these goals are met, you simply can't lose.
Now, how does one accomplish these goals??? By following the two basic rules, of course! These are fairly broad rules, and you can probably argue that there are quite a number of specific rules buried inside each one, but for the guys...it's easier to just dumb this down to two overarching rules. Gents, we work better with small numbers, face it.
RULE#1)ALWAYS BE A GENTLEMAN.
RULE#2)lET HER SET THE PACE.
See? Simple but broad rules. They are designed only to meet the goals previously stated, but can often achieve much more. Of course, the implications of each are enough to fill volumes, but they still come back to being a gentleman and letting her set the pace. Yes, following these rules and goals can be painstakingly slow, at times, but they offer you the best chance at long-term and short-term success. In these days of instant gratification and electronic media, there's something to be said for a person who knows how to take it slow and invest his time and effort into another person. It's called "Intimacy," and it's not a dirty word. It shows the other person that you value them, that their needs and deisres matter to you, and that it doesn't have to be all about you. It's about respect, after all.
On an aside to the ladies. These rules and goals? You should insist upon them.
Thanks for reading,
The Fat Kid
No comments:
Post a Comment